7 ways to tell your local casino has been hacked

Written by Nich Moore on 2017-03-17 at 11:23
Local casinos hacked Can there be such a thing as a hacked casino? (Photo: New York Times )
With the internet leaks of celebrity images such as those of Emma Watson, and footage such as that of Mischa Barton, becoming ever more frequent we are constantly reminded of just how precarious our cyber security situation can be. Your local casino is likely to be one of many infrastructural targets the hackers will choose to attack next, but how can you tell if your local casino has been hacked or not? What are the signs to look out for? We've the answers.

1. Parking Lot Sign Says Beware Of Zombies


This will be, in oh so many ways, the first warning you'll get that your local casino has been hacked by the legions of cyberspace. Almost traditional now, warnings of an impending or ongoing zombie apocalypse have adorned digital road signs world wide, many through use of a default password, and whilst your local casino might be a little better defended than that, the signs in the parking lot will still be the first port of call for the invading hoards, their well known meme treated almost as a calling card.

2. The Receptionist Are In Tears And Making Threats


Naturally the human components of any computer network are its weakest link and given the high level of automation in booking, billing and reception the overlap between technology and the staff is greatest. Hackers will target these staff members will troll tactics as much as they will the systems themselves, so if you like to bet on sports in the US and arrive at your local casino for a little fun only to find all the receptionists either in tears or so angry they're spitting teeth and threats, try Bet365 at home instead.

3. The Muzak Has Been Replaced With Dubstep


Between automated playlists and a resort wide public address system a notable sign that your local casino has been hacked will be a starkly obvious difference in the muzak. Where once easy listening might have ruled the roost there will be Skrillex with Scary Monsters & Nice Sprites, or perhaps La Roux and In For The Kill, and if you couldn't tell dubstep from a two-step just look to the faces of your fellow patrons as the bass drops harder than a pop astrophysics quiz on a Monday morning. It'll show.

4. All Video Screens Are Showing Midget Porn


Obviously US gambling laws prevent the patrons of casinos being shown porn, 1950s morality still reigns, but hackers are unlikely to allow that preventing them replacing odds and statistics on the numerous plasma and LCD units within your local casino with amateur housewives or emo teenage midget porn of all varieties. Should you find yourself suddenly confronted with the sort of view only a gynecologist or customs officer usually sees you may wish to return home and used the safer Bet365 instead.

5. Room Key Cards Cease To Function As Designed


The security swipe card has become ubiquitous in the hotel and casino resort business and a sure sign your local casino has been hacked will be that system failing to operate. Online entities like Bet365 have their cyber security tighter than a gnat's bum, and if you find your local casino resort's key card suddenly opens every door in the complex except your own you can pretty much take it for read that the minions the internet have penetrated security and leaving the establishment will be the only sensible option.

6. Core Functions Of Your Local Casino Have Been Compromised


Computer systems control far more than the obvious number crunching we've so happily relinquished to them but these command systems in modern facilities like your local casino are highly susceptible to attack, and if you think the worst they can do is simply disable the television in your room just ponder for a moment how much you'd prefer to be at home on Bet365 when the hackers decide to throw a few switches and have the bio-waste disposal system pump out into the air conditioning units. It's lots, isn't it?

7. Black Clad Armed Figures Fleeing The Scene


Anyone in the US gambling news headlines will not one day scream of hackers assisting in the theft of large quantities of funds from a casino simply hasn't been paying attention to popular culture, and the days to that media frenzy are shortening all the time. However actual removal of physical funds will take physical allies, so if you're shouldered aside by a group of burly chaps carrying large bulging bags you might want to go and check out the opportunities on Bet365, because your local casino has been hacked.
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