A quick look at the stars tells us all we need to know about our futures so lets see what they have in store for you this week
Aries March 21 – April 19
You might be thinking of going crazy like fellow Aries Lady Gaga but whilst it might make you feel better those around you are unlikely to be so happy at your reaction. Calm calculation would reassure them but you won’t feel like being so relaxed. Try to remain positive and hang on till the weekend when a positive surprise awaits you and things will start to look less like the asylum walls. Your lucky vegetable is Wayne Rooney and your lucky nuclear reactor is Beaver Valley in Pennsylvania.
Taurus April 20 – May 20
You’ll be a winner this week just as sure as Kelly Clarkson, a fellow Taurian, won American Idol, so take up every challenge sure in the knowledge you can’t put a foot wrong. If you like to bet on sports in the UK don’t forget to stick something on your favorite event this week at Bet365 because the chances are you’ll walk away better off. Midweek will see a problem crop up you weren’t expecting, but take it in your stride, you’ll have it done and dusted by the weekend. Your lucky disease is polio, your lucky colour is magenta.
Gemini May 21 – June 20
By midweek you’ll wish you had a twin like that famous Gemini Ashley Olsen because then they could take your place. Your colleagues and loved ones seem determined to take simple matters and draw them out with unnecessary complication, try to remain on an even keel around them despite your irritation and impatience. There will be a disappointment for you on the weekend but try to be stoic about it and not let it get you down. Your lucky cultural center is the Waino Aaltonen Museum of Art and you should beware dogs with pink collars.
Cancer June 21 – July 22
Tom Cruise might also be a Cancer but even the action movie hero won’t be able to save you from a prior engagement you now wish you didn’t have to go through with. Put on your best face, grin and bear it and you’ll find it not quite as bad as it could have been. A mystery will make itself apparent just before the weekend but don’t waste those precious days of relaxation trying to solve it, the answer will crop up later without prompting. You should steer clear of stately homes and avoid anyone from Morgartenberg.
Leo July 23 – August 22
Despite having Daniel Radcliffe as a fellow Leo there’s no magic to your successes this week, they’ll come from the sweat of your brow and some serious concentration on the tasks before you, however you will find yourself pleasantly rewarded for your efforts by those who don’t usually show their appreciation. You should stay away from the colour orange and remember at all times that things you say are remembered by others. Your lucky Albanian football coach is Dritan Baholli and your lucky song is “Stormy Weather” by Arlen & Koehler.
Virgo August 23 – September 22
You may not be able to dunk them like fellow Virgo Kobe Bryant this week due to the inconsideration of those around you, but your judgment is spot on whether they see it or not so don’t forget to click on over to Bet365 where your assessments stand to reward you more than trying to convince colleagues or loved ones of their obstructionism. There will be a message from out of the blue on the weekend that you shouldn’t ignore regardless of how minor it seems at the time. Your lucky bluegrass band is The Scottsville Squirrel Barkers and your lucky pie is Apple.
Libra September 23 – October 22
There won’t be much point getting all gangster, like that other Libra Snoop Dogg, this week despite the temptation. You won’t need to push that hard to get what you want done or said, just take your time and people will come round to your way of thinking. Don’t upset an elder of your group as they will take out all their frustrations on you unfairly. The weekend will be a little fraught as you’re dragged from pillar to post but it’ll be rewarding none-the-less. Your lucky river is the South Nahanni in Canada.
Scorpio October 23 – November 21
You will easily be able to escape the clutches of any web you find yourself in this week just like fellow Scorpio Emma Stone in the Spiderman movies as your powers to convince others seem unstoppable. Be sure to keep loved ones informed at all times as an omission could be viewed as a slight. With UK gambling laws as they are you should take advantage at Bet365 and back your instincts because the chances are you’ll do well out those choices. Your lucky deity is Ah Peku, God of Thunder, and your lucky South American philosopher is Bolivar Echeverria.
Sagittarius November 22 – December 21
You’ll have to put on a good act this week like fellow Sagittarian Brad Pitt in order to hide your discomfort but if you keep from sharing your agonies you’ll find relief from them on the weekend when things calm down and become less fraught. An animal marks the way to success in business so keep an eye out but avoid the number 33 where possible. Your lucky railway station is Waddinxveen in the Netherlands and your lucky female ice hockey player is Canadian Jennifer Wakefield.
Capricorn December 22 – January 19
Just like Betty White, another Capricorn, you’ll be golden this week so take some risks and see the results flow in your favor. At work you should be able to make headway on an issue that has stagnated in recent weeks, but be sure to save your colleagues their blushes and not to become too bigheaded. There will be ample rewards for all by the weekend during which you’ll find a new way to relax you’d not previously tried. Your lucky orphanage is Copprome in El Progreso Honduras, and your lucky World War II transport vessel is USS Windsor.
Aquarius January 20 – February 18
You might want to make a big show of it all this week just like Oprah Winfrey, who was also born under the sign of Aquarius, and perhaps you shouldn’t restrain the impulse as there’s definite signs that you will be able to pull off whatever it is you decide to set your mind to. Midweek will see a small hiccup in the road to victory but by the weekend you’ll have reversed that setback. Your lucky Late Permian animal is an Nanictidopdae and your lucky sixteenth century satire is “Corona Regia”.
Pisces February 19 – March 20
Like fellow Pisces Chuck Norris you’ll be unstoppable this week if only you remain sure of yourself and don’t let others around you sap your confidence. Recent changes will settle in and begin to show fruits for your labors but don’t go gambling news will always be good and be ready to face challenges to this new status quo before the weekend. There will be an interesting diversion you should ignore on Friday, the road to madness indicated by an odd number. Your lucky beetle is a Coleoxestia errata and your lucky Christian Rock album is “Third Verse” by the Smalltown Poets.