It’s a list that had to be made. The 10 most annoying behaviors at the poker table. As with all things in life, the problems, more often than not, come from having to deal with other people. And so it is with table gambling and poker. “Other people” can either make or break the experience. And yet we still need someone to play against and even win money from.
Introduction: The 10 Most Annoying Behaviors at the Poker Table
These are just some of the many behaviors and unsociable ticks found by online poker news in the US, that can drive a grown man to drink or worse, force him to leave the game. Have a look…and please don’t be that guy!
1. Slow Rolling
Come on guys, when a hand is called, move yourself! You’re supposed to reveal your cards. Why be a drama queen about it. We really don’t have the time or patience to wait around for your “reveal”. Just show your hand. We don’t care if you won or lost. Well, if you’ve won and you take an age to show your hand because you want to rub our faces in it, then, yeah, you’re annoying to everyone.
2. Taking Too Much Time to Act
Just like number one on this list, just get a move on. Or play from home with Juicy Stakes. We haven’t come here to watch the scenery. If you’re unsure when to act, then please just ask. We are all nice and approachable people. We will not bite you! Also, please pay attention to the game at hand. Stop looking at the cocktail waitress. We don’t want to be constantly reminding you of your turn. It gets old pretty fast. Get your act together. This is a social game, with other people involved. Here’s a tip: bet, raise, check or fold. Easy!
3. Telling Bad Beat Stories
Yeah, yeah, if we’ve heard these at least once, then you can be absolutely sure that we’ve all heard them a thousand times. So you were outdrawn. Some clumsy person spilled their drink just when you were laying down your cards. Or the power went off as you were about to win (insert huge amount here). Here’s the thing. We don’t care. No, not in the slightest. Got it! So shut up and play!
4. Annoying Behaviors at the Poker Table: Bad Hygiene
Just thinking about some of the unhygienic customers we’ve seen, makes us throw up into our mouths a little. To start with, if you sneeze into your hand, don’t continue to handle the cards. It’s disgusting. Also, having a shower at least once in the week before you come out, can ensure you’re not playing on your own in a bubble of your own smell. Same with brushing you teeth and doing something about those gnarly finger nails. If you’re sick, please just stay at home. We don’t want to see and hear a never ending supply of snot being blasted into your filthy crusty handkerchief as you play. And stop eating messy foods at the table!
5. Excessive Talking
Stop chatting when you’re playing. We are trying to concentrate and your incessant gabbing is both off putting and supremely irritating. More especially if you’re talking to yourself. OK, we are not playing in a hospital and are free to speak. But remember that we’re here to play poker. Oh, and stop that tutting or low whistling ever time you get dealt. We don’t care how good/bad your hand is. So get over yourself already. Or just go home and play with one of these online poke sites from the US.
6. Rubbing in a Win
We get it, your aces beat my Kings. But just shut up about it. Just don’t say anything. Anything at all. Just rake the pot and be quiet about it.
7. Drunk Players
We’re not a fan of playing drunk. It’s not fair on yourself and gives a massive advantage to your opponents. If you’re drunk, or even tipsy, then just walk away from the games room. We know that playing drunks can up the odds of winning, but for us this is simply a false victory and, deep down, is unethical. If someone is really drunk, then please alert the management and have them escorted off the premises completely. We take the stand that if an establishment allows drunks to play, then we will not bring our business there.
8. Exposing Cards
This can be a double edged sword. So the next player isn’t covering his cards very well. You’re only human so you take a peek. We see that as fair game. (Though you really should do the honorable thing and point out his error). On the other hand, nothing will enrage you quite as much as two players deliberately showing their cards to each other. In the end, everyone should just do the right thing and cover their hand well. Or play against your computer screen at home with Juicy Stakes.
9. Annoying Behaviors at the Poker Table: Whining
Yeah so you lost. It’s no biggy. Tomorrow is another day. But stop going on about how different thing might of turned out. If only (insert lame excuse here). Here’s the rub: we don’t care. So please just shut up, accept the day is done, and leave.
10. Giving Lessons (a.k.a. “Tapping the Glass”)
Please don’t give others advice at the poker table. Seasoned players don’t need or want it. Novices will leave the table after feeling embarrassed. Look, maybe you mean well. But good players know where the win comes from. And there’s no need to give some lesser player a free poker lesson. You’re not doing me any favors by doing that. If a player is continuously making the same mistake, you don’t have to point it out to him. Let each player figure out their own game. If someone is losing, it means that others are winning. So don’t spoil the party.
Conclusion: The 10 Most Annoying Behaviors at the Poker Table
When you’re playing poker, your winnings come from a simple difference between you and your opponents skill level. So, everyone just relax. If you’re winning then the last thing you want to do is drive your opponent away from your table. To that end, everyone stay chill, be polite and relaxed. Like Bond. Or just like in life.